Q Fever! Medical Humor & Satire
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February 6, 2002 | Volume 3, Issue 1

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Angioplasty Better Than Cabbage For Coronary Artery Disease

Cole slaw particularly ineffective

DURHAM, NC--A researcher at Duke University Medical Center released last week the results of a study that could change the way many medical centers treat coronary artery disease.

Cabbage: proven inadedquate
for treatment of CAD

The study, which involved hundreds of patients over over a five-year period, attempted to answer the question: Should a patient with severe coronary artery disease be treated with balloon angioplasty (with or without stenting), or given a cabbage?

"It's an age-old question, no doubt," said study chairman Dr. Harry Syvertsen. "But I think we can safely say now - whoever said cabbage was a good idea was an imbecile."

Indeed, the study found that, of the almost two hundred patients with symptomatic coronary vessel obstruction who were given heads of cabbage and sent home, every single one eventually required either emergency angioplasty or bypass grafting.

Of these, poorer outcomes were found in those patients who had attempted to make cole slaw or cabbage borscht, while cabbage stew and casserole lovers fared slightly better.

"All I know is, all these years my patients have been getting cabbages when, in my opinion, they should have gotten revascularized, or at least have had PTCA or stenting done," said Syvertsen. "They mocked me when I said cabbage was a bad idea. Who's laughing now?!"

Syvertsen's study will be published in the Journal of the American College of Cabbology (JACC) later this month.






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