Q Fever! Medical Humor & Satire

November 1, 2000 | Volume 1, Issue 10

[BACK ISSUE - Click Here For Current Issue!]


Heart Transplantion Study Halted Abruptly

Transplant of placebo "a disaster," admits researcher

BOSTON, MA - Researchers at Boston's Holy Cross Medical Center have abruptly terminated a prospective study of heart transplantation outcomes, said a spokesperson for the group Thursday.

The study, which had originally been projected to last ten to twelve years, was canceled after only three months after the control population, which received transplantation of a heart-shaped styrofoam placebo in lieu of a real heart, was found to have unexpectedly excessive morbidity and mortality, nearing 100% in some cases.

Mark O' Reilly, MD
placebo transplantion

"Basically, we've proven a couple of things," said Mark O' Reilly, MD, a cardiothoracic surgeon. "First and foremost, heart transplantation saves lives. Secondly, placebo transplantation does exactly the opposite of that. [It's] quite a disaster."

As compared with patients receiving an actual heart, patients receiving a placebo were reported to experience a higher incidence of hypotension, shock, and fulminant hemodynamic embarrassment. Resuscitative efforts were generally futile.

"We were obviously hoping we'd have better results with the placebo heart," said O' Reilly.

Of note, one placebo recipient, Barney Ross of Pismo Beach, CA, has continued to do well with his styrofoam heart more than 45 days after receiving it. Although unable to participate in most athletic activities, he plays golf three times a week, and maintains an otherwise normal lifestyle.

  • More Stuff!

web qfever.com

Remember: Quality Without The Q Is Just Uality!


Mailing List

New issues, etc.



Confirm Email:

The Q Fever!

Makes a great

only $13.99